Don't think you chose to be happy.

/October 2023

when I first started writing, other people's comments were always "extreme" and "boring". She was one of the few readers who would take the time to read carefully no matter what I wrote. Every time I finish an article, I always have to ask her for advice. In fact, she is not completely partial to me, even in most of the time, her evaluation is "not good enough".

and whenever she says "not good enough", I will try my best to modify it. Although she is not always right, after every revision, I think from the bottom of my heart that the article has become better than before. I'm not sure why, maybe because it's her opinion.

so with the help of this "good reader", my writing is much smoother than it was two years ago.

but in the process, there will be all kinds of problems between us. There are things about the future and about readers (she once forced me to give her red envelopes because some readers commented on my circle of friends). Even at some point, when I brag to her about her grand plans for the future, she will be instantly lost.

I asked why.

she said, "you're always talking about the future, but it doesn't seem to mention me."

scared me to invent a dream of traveling around the world, including her and me.

of course when I say this, you feel more showing off, but my original intention is not that. I just want to tell you through this example:

when something becomes "indispensable" in your life, then it must bring you as much unhappiness as pleasure.


in La La City, the hero has long known that persistence like him doesn't work in real life, and all the people who have worked with him think he's a problem, because he always thinks the essence of jazz is "improvisation."

but one morning, when he heard the hostess on the phone with her family, he decided to give up "pure" jazz and join a new band. Because the hostess said, "Yes, he doesn't have a stable job yet, but he will work hard."

it is precisely because in the low voice of the heroine, there is not only no disgust, but all favouritism. So the man thought it was time.

it's time to find a stable job, it's time to give in to a life you don't like, because it's time to take responsibility.

talented people never run out of food, and the man accepts the invitation to join a new jazz band. But the music there is not only jazz, but also electronic elements.

he is so handsome on the stage and is liked by many people.

but she could see that he didn't like himself on the stage.

then they quarreled for obvious reasons. The hostess denounced him for compromise, while the man thought, "if it wasn't for you, how could I compromise?"

-I like you because you are naive.

-if I continue to be naive, I can foresee the bad future.

and their starting point is "for the good of each other", so no one can solve this ultimate contradiction, not even the director of La La City.

then the oven sounded an alarm, interrupting their argument.

the man helplessly opened the oven full of smoke, which contained the surprise he had prepared.

that surprise is a cake, a "want to see you" before departure, and a compromise to life.

when I saw this, I couldn't come up with a good solution. I often hear people who are in love say, "I am very tired". The "tired" here is actually the helplessness in love.

I am bound to meet helplessness.


in the movie, the male and female finally separated, and in the last ten minutes of the film, as the camera advanced, we saw the male fantasy:

what the future would be like with her.

but reality is heroic.

later Vivi told me that at the beginning of the scene when the man nodded to the woman, she couldn't hold back and burst into tears.

she said to me, "it's a pity that they didn't get together."

I said, "it's actually pretty good, at least they've faced so many choices together."

in fact, this movie is more about "choice". About dreams, about the choice of love.

when others can't understand you, do you choose to stick to yourself "blatantly" or "secretly" to be yourself?

in the face of life, do you choose to be happy or to make the people around you more comfortable?

in the face of their dreams, do they choose to follow each other or leave alone?

five years later, when you meet someone you once loved again, do you choose to forget each other or try your best to save it? Don't forget, you all have different lives.

the director gives his own answer, but that doesn't mean it's the only answer.

because no matter how you choose, there is no right or wrong. And because of this answer, it doesn't really depend on you, you only account for 50% of it.

the remaining 50%, you have to give it to the one next to you.

he may throw cold water on you, give you encouragement, go with you without hesitation, or resolutely.Resolutely parting with you. He even wept and asked you, "if you can stay a little longer, maybe you don't want to leave."

so it's like playing on a seesaw, whether your side goes up or down, depending on whether the other person sits down with all his strength, or secretly pads his feet.

at the moment of making a choice, reason is useless, and all that is left is the sensibility of you two.

so don't think that when you fall in love, you choose to be happy. Can only be beautiful love, it is a kindergarten-level fantasy.

stunning lavender bridesmaid dresses make a great look for nearly any locale . They are perfect for any occasion.

because you just choose who to go through those joys and pains with.

finally, we often see some people asking us backstage: "Why do I want to fall in love so much, but I am still single?"

my answer is a little hurtful, so pretend not to see these questions, but when I watch "La La City" again in the cinema in Chengdu, I think I should tell them my opinion through this movie:

because you don't know how to love someone yet.

you don't even know how to be loved.