"I've thought about breaking up 26 times in the past three years."

27
/October 2023

Lvzi was with Lao Wan, who had just graduated in his junior year. Although he was in a long-distance relationship, fortunately, Dongguan and Guangzhou were not far away, so they would meet and date every weekend.

usually on Wednesday, Lao Wan will use several times his efforts to finish the work that may arise on the weekend ahead of time, while Luzi will rack his brains to start planning which restaurant to eat at the weekend, which new place to visit, and where the environment is suitable for taking photos and posting moments.

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at that time, this seemed to be the driving force of their lives. All the hard work was preparing for the pleasure of the weekend. Luzi and Lao Wan in the moments were more like a model couple.

Lvzi is a senior in the twinkling of an eye. At the suggestion of Lao Wan, Luzi went to live with him in Guangzhou, and then prepared to find an internship.

but before long, Luzi came to me to tell me that their lives had become so boring that she began to wonder if this kind of life was what she wanted.

Lao Wan was also very upset and asked me, "Why doesn't she always understand that this is life?"

it's interesting to open God's perspective.

Luzi told me that when I was with Lao Wan, everything in Lao Wan would make way for himself, but now I was waiting for him every day. I finally waited for him for a few hours, and by the time Lao Wan was finished, he looked tired and fell asleep, not to mention loving words.

Lao Wan told me that now I live with Luzi every day, and I no longer have a chance to do other things in advance. I often have to mess with the company's forms with the computer when I get home. While working, I have to worry about whether the green boy will be angry or not, and I feel frightened every day.

Lvzi added: "in the past, Lao Wan and I would carefully choose a restaurant every time we had dinner, and even went to a place ten kilometers away for dinner and then came back, but now I can guess with my eyes closed. He will take me to the small restaurant downstairs tonight."

Lao Wan is also very upset: "in the past, I only dated Luzi on weekends, and the opportunity was rare. Of course, I would change my tricks to give surprises, but now that I live together, how can I always have so many tricks to play with? moreover, it is my life to eat in the small restaurant downstairs every day."

I asked them separately: "in that case, have you talked about this?"

their answers to this question are surprisingly consistent, telling me that there is nothing to talk about, because every time they talk about this issue, it will eventually lead them to start a round of quarrels.

this reminds me of the story of Ajun and her husband in the Quartet.

when they were lovers, they would go to the coffee shop, watch the children fly kites, give each other poetry collections and CD, and live a life of greasy sweetness.

after her marriage, she put the violin in the corner and stopped reading poetry, daily cooking replaced flying kites, instant coffee powder replaced coffee shops, and pop music in the player replaced classical music. even sending him messages just asking him to help buy detergent home.

when they heard that a couple had been together for 40 years, A Jun's reaction was "Wow, 40 years", while the dry students were "Oh, 40 years".

at that time, Gan Sheng said to her, "A Jun continues to play the violin and continue to do what you like," but A Jun's response is "this is what I like now."

A roll changed from an elegant and mysterious violinist to a happy housewife, but the dry life could not accept such a boring life and finally had to flee in a hurry.

A Jun feels that he has got a family, while a dry student thinks he has lost a lover.

Don't think that this is just a plot in the film and television, in fact, this kind of story is shown in reality every day.

after most relationships last for a year and a half, or after a couple begins to spend a long time together, it is easier to see the true face of their love life.

We can call it "insipid" or, more bluntly, "boring".

this true face is not easily accepted, just like Luzi and dry students, are fighting it in their own way, trying to tell it that "you are wrong, true love should not be like this."

but do they really know what love should be?

I don't think so, it's just their imagination.

since childhood, no one has ever taught our generation what love is, so we can only make up for the knowledge about love through novels, movies and TV dramas.

but what is easy to be overlooked is that those "not so good" love works attract the audience not by the nature of love, but by the drama behind it.

so "Love" is always regarded as too important, and it must be a great, mysterious and vigorous thing, just like the situation of the hero and heroine in every idol play.

although this huge contrast can be disappointing, I still have to tell you:

all the love in the world is a very common and common emotion, and it is inevitable that it will eventually be reduced to boredom, and most people's lives are destined to be linked to mediocrity, whether it's Green Zi, A Roll, or you and I.

because this is what love and life are supposed to be like.

when she had dinner with Luzi again a long time later, she stopped complaining to me.

when I was about to leave, I teased her with interest: "has Lao Wan surprised you recently?"

she said to me with a straight face, "there is no surprise. He has been promoted recently and often has to work overtime. He even has fewer and fewer opportunities to eat small restaurants together."

after that, Luzi asked the waiter to bring the lunch box and said to me sheepishly, "pack up and go back and give it to Lao Wan's stupid dog."

mention the oldTen thousand hours, while swearing, Luzi put the food into the lunch box, but the corners of his mouth turned up unwittingly.

this may seem contradictory, but it's not at all.

I know that Luzi is not accepting fate or compromise, but just like the sentence written on her Wechat signature.

"it's scary to think about facing a person all your life. But if it's you, you'll give it a try. "

I think this is the real meaning of love.

good night.