People with poor character always like to talk about these three topics. Don't get to know each other deeply when you encounter them.
as the saying goes, "you can see your character when you speak, but show your EQ in the world."
whether in life or work, character is the key to whether a person is worth interacting with or not.
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the way of speaking can actually see a person's way of being a man.
there are not many friends, but exquisite and precious.
when dealing with people, if the other person always likes to talk about the following three topics, then his character must be bad, such a person should stay away as soon as possible.
insulting words to sow discord between right and wrong
in our daily life, we always meet people who often talk about other people's rights and wrongs behind their backs and sow discord.
they always use this way to elevate themselves and belittle others.
there is a good saying: "those who say that people are right and wrong must be right and wrong."
I think so.
in the unit where I used to work, I met a colleague who was particularly fond of gossiping.
he often spreads some gossip at work, and he often adds something out of nothing to spread what some colleagues have said and done.
A colleague called his family to say some very private things, which he overheard and trumpeted at work. In the end, the colleague had no choice but to resign.
two colleagues ate alone, and when he saw it, he trumpeted it, and when the leader knew about it, they both were dismissed on the grounds of banning office romance.
A colleague uttered a few words casually because he was too tired at work. He immediately went to the leader to gossip, and the leader later dismissed this colleague on the grounds that he was not active in his work.
there are villains who gossip everywhere. If you can't fight him, you have to stay away from him.
Lin Qingxuan once said:
"when we are far away from words and right and wrong, all our existence truly reveals its original value."
Don't always pry into other people's privacy, and then add to it and exaggerate the facts to spread. This is what clowns do.
people who sow discord always gloat after others, build their happiness on the sufferings of others, and fan the flames among others for fear that the world will not cause chaos.
what we have to do is: "near a gentleman, far from a villain."
I have heard a conversation between Han Shan and Gidi, an ancient Zen master:
Hanshan asked: "some people in the world slander me, bully me, humiliate me, laugh at me, belittle me, cheat me, deceive me, what should I do?"
pick it up and say, "just put up with him and let him avoid him, respect him, respect him, ignore him, and look at him in a few years."
always be vigilant and keep a distance from those who sow discord.
as the saying goes, "when you sit still, you often think about your own mistakes, and you can't talk about others."
if you have the time to gossip, you might as well take more time to enrich yourself and improve yourself.
you can greet villains frequently and get along politely, but you must have less small talk and never have a deep acquaintance with villains.
complaints about passing the buck
have you ever met such a person:
it is the quickest to pass the buck when something happens, and it is always the first to take credit.
their favorite words are: "I don't know, it's none of my business."
there is a plot in the TV series Ode to Joy:
Michelle, Guan's colleague, was ill, and she asked her to help her with an urgent plan at hand.
before that, Michelle had already done the first half, and Guan went on to finish the second half and signed his name on the final responsible person.
unexpectedly, Michelle made a mistake in the first half, but Michelle refused to admit it and told the manager that Guan was in charge of the plan.
the angry manager called Guan Yue er, scolded him and asked him to write a review book to her.
when Michelle was pretending to be ill to avoid work, Guan gave her cold medicine first, and then helped her to get some medicine. Finally, she also helped the other party to do her own work, so that Michelle went home early to have a rest.
her kindness was given to the wrong person, and in the end, she was the only one who was eaten back.
A person's character depends on the way he deals with things.
Michelle's practice that she will only pass the buck in case of trouble doomed her to be a treacherous and hypocritical person.
Maugham once said:
"to make a person show his nature, it is the most effective way to ask him to take on a kind of responsibility."
in life, each of us has our own responsibilities and obligations, and we need to be responsible for what we have done.
if you only pass the buck when you encounter something, evade responsibility, or even use others as a shield.
make friends with such a person, you will always be the one to take the blame for him, so the farther away from him, the better!
there is an old saying: "you must not do harm to others, and you must guard against others."
A person who often shirks his responsibility and blames others will do this to others today, but he may do that to you tomorrow.
when you find that the people around you have such a tendency, say goodbye as soon as possible.
unreliable empty talk
sincerity is the basis of dealing with people, and if one can't even do that, there's no need to associate with it.
at a classmate reunion some time ago, classmate Okawa has been bragging about himself ever since he was seated.
he said that when he came here, he could hardly show his passbook to everyone what kind of car he was driving, what brand-name clothes he was wearing, and how many square meters he lived in.
A classmate frowned when he was eating, and Okawa casually asked what was wrong.
this classmate said that he had encountered a difficult problem recently. when the child reached the age that he should go to school, he wanted the child to go to a certain school, but the school said there were no places.
after hearing this, Okawa patted his chest and said, "this is easy. The school director is my best friend. I'm sure I can help you get this done."
later, the classmate went to Okawa several times and was dealt with by him each time. It is not that he has been too busy recently, that is to say, the instructor is on a business trip.
finally forced to do nothing about it, Okawa admitted that he had lied and didn't know any instructor at all. He just drank too much and bragged that day.
Qian Zhongshu said: "I am so used to boasting that I even believe it myself."
some people save face and like to boast and brag in front of others, but this is not a reason for boasting and empty talk.
as the ancients said, "A man cannot stand without faith."
empty talk does not cost, but it consumes your own character.
"here comes the wolf" shouts too much, and you will be unable to move in the crowd.
people who are worth interacting with, they make promises, and they never make promises to others easily.
when summing up the wisdom of dealing with the world, Zeng Guofan said: "We must respect each other and open our mouths with sincerity."
people who only make empty promises for the sake of face and popularity, regardless of the weight of promises, are not worth interacting with at all.
when you listen to what they say, laugh it off and don't take it seriously.
to stay away from such people is the best way to protect yourself.
A person's character can be seen in small details, and there is also a person's EQ hidden in the words.
in the communication between people, we must attach importance to quality rather than appearance.
, people who hope to be invited into life for the rest of their lives are trustworthy.