The world of adults: no one is suffering, there is no need to cry out for pain

/October 2023



Zhang ailing said:

"Life is a gorgeous robe full of lice."

for most people, life is beautiful on the outside, but each has its own sufferings on the inside.

especially for adults, it has long been invaded by the wind and frost of life.

in the world of adults, everyone suffers

saw a very warm video on Douyin.

A delivery boy, while delivering milk tea to a customer, accidentally spilled milk tea on the floor that the customer had just wiped clean.

seeing this unexpected situation, he immediately lay down on the ground, cleaned with his bare hands, and kept apologizing to the customer and asking him not to give him a bad review.

the customer hurriedly helped him up and said that he was all right and would not give him a bad comment, but he refused to stand up.

with the determined support of the customers, the takeout boy stood up.

later, in the interview, the customer said that it was not the takeout clerk's fault that he did not catch the milk tea.

No matter whose fault it is, you can feel the humility and bitterness of the takeout clerk in the video.

some netizens commented: "the collapse of adults always happens in an instant."

in fact, this takeout is not the epitome of most adults: making a living in hardship and survival in humility.

in the adult world, everyone is suffering and everyone is tired.

in order to live, we are all busy day and night, rain or shine.

maybe it's to improve the life of your family, maybe it's because of your dream, or maybe you have to bow to life because of reality.

Balzac's "Gao Old Man" says:

"there is real suffering and false joy everywhere."

in life, there are too many people pretending to be happy while carrying a heavy load.

it always rains and there is always a quagmire in life.

when we cross it, everyone is happy; if we can't cross it, we will be bound by sand and it will be difficult for us to walk.

therefore, even if life is hard, we should turn the bitterness of life into a jar of honey.

suffering will eventually be over, and we will eventually be sweet.

Adult grievances, there is no need to shout pain

my friend Xiao Zhang talked about one of his experiences.

he was dismissed by the company in disguise this year for some reasons.

because he is also a veteran in the company, being dismissed this time really made him sad for a long time.

when he left, he wanted to pour out his indignation at being dismissed to his colleagues who were close to him.

however, as soon as he opened his mouth, his colleague interrupted him and said, "dude, I'm a little busy at the moment. Why don't we have dinner some other time?"

Xiao Zhang suddenly has no desire to tell.

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he swallowed back his words awkwardly and replaced it with a bitter smile: "it's all right, you're busy first. I just want to say goodbye to you."

when he got home, he planned to talk to his wife about his distress, but he heard his wife complain that he was incompetent, that his home loan and car loan, and the tuition fees of his children were all on his wife's own.

he could only hold back his sadness and silently went into the bathroom to smoke a cigarette.

Xiao Zhang said that he had never been so sad as at that moment, and the grievance in his heart was nothing but a joke in the eyes of others.

the pain that goes to the bone, in the eyes of others, is just a kind of hypocrisy.

I remember Yang Mi was asked by the host in an interview: "are you not good at saying that you are really hard?"

Yang Mi replied, "Yes, I will say it in my heart."

indeed, the grievances of adults should be taken to heart and there is no need to shout out loudly.

in this world, there are countless stories in everyone's heart, but not many people really understand the story.

over time, some stories can only rot in my heart, unable to say, and nowhere to tell.

once read a particularly poignant sentence:

"No one cares how you cry in the middle of the night, nor do you care how many autumn you have to go to sleep over and over again. Outsiders only see the results and support the process on their own."

in the adult world, there is no real empathy.

everyone has their own unspeakable sufferings. Most people are mud bodhisattvas crossing the river, and they may not be able to protect themselves. Who will give up their lives to share your worries and solve your problems?

most of the time, our talk may solve the temporary troubles, but after a long time, you have to go through it by yourself, and no one can replace it.

there has never been a comfort that can comfort you all your life.

only you know the ups and downs of life.

in fact, we spend the longest time with ourselves all our lives.

then, when you are depressed, keep quiet and sit down and have a heart-to-heart talk with yourself.

maybe you will suddenly become enlightened.

instead of complaining around, learn to heal yourself

in the TV series "I am willing to Love the whole World for you", Zhang Changgong, played by Luo Jin, is a very ordinary computer major graduate with average family conditions and running up against a brick wall when looking for a job.

but instead of complaining everywhere, he is looking for all kinds of opportunities to open up the workplace, which is not too much for him.The door of friendship.

finally reluctantly squeezed into an IT company, but also by virtue of their excellent professional ability, all the way to fight monsters, sitting on the position of vice president of the company.

when his career reached its peak, the Internet industry encountered the biggest trough, and his company was not spared and was on the verge of bankruptcy.

he lost his job overnight and became a loafer. Without a source of income, he suddenly felt a lot of pressure.

later, in the process of looking for a job, due to the hindrance of the market economy, he no longer encountered a high-paying job with a monthly income of more than 10,000 yuan, so he either accepted a low salary of one or two thousand yuan or had to stay at home and stay unemployed.

in this way, he stayed at home unemployed for a whole year.

during this year, it is conceivable that his previous savings have been unable to make ends meet, but his work has not yet settled.

anyone may have emotions, but even if he runs out of ammunition and food, he can always remain rational and strive to find a breakthrough in life.

in the process of falling and getting up, he finally found his own way out: writing online novels.

this also brought him to the pinnacle of his life, the novel was a hit, and his life value was realized. Finally surpassed the crawling, confused and helpless self in the past.

Hemingway said in A Farewell to Arms:

"Life always makes us black and blue, but in the end, those injured places will certainly become our strongest places."

everyone's life is bittersweet, it will give us warmth, and naturally it will make us black and blue.

however, strong people will learn to heal alone when they are injured.

he doesn't easily talk about his difficulties, let alone get stuck in the doldrums.

but alone through the darkness, toward the direction of light.

people's life is destined to be lonely, come alone, go alone.

so, in this stormy life, we should learn to hold umbrellas and keep warm by ourselves.

May you be a quiet person for the rest of your life

when we were young, we often liked a lively life. What happens, I wish people knew all day; what grievances I have suffered, I wish everyone would take you into my arms.

however, the older you get, the more you feel that in the adult world, silence tends to be more useful than noise.

Silence may not be omnipotent, but it is an excellent way to deal with life.

as Zhang Dinghao wrote in "I like everything that is incomplete":

"I like you to suddenly cover my chattering mouth and teach me to be silent."

this "you" can be a person or a life.

people's life is never easy. We always have to go through enough storms to see the gorgeous rainbow on the horizon.

when the bitterness of life teaches us to remain silent, it proves that we are really beginning to mature.

just wish us to be quiet people for the rest of our lives. No matter how hard life is, don't cry for pain. Just get through it and everything will be all right.